In ancient Israelite culture, betrothal was a well-defined period that often lasted a year or more before the actual marriage ceremony. Understanding the cultural backdrop of betrothal helps us appreciate the significance of Mary’s answer to Gabriel.
Betrothal established a marriage covenant. In Jesus' time a covenant would be established as the result of the prospective bridegroom traveling from his father's house to the home of the prospective bride. There he would negotiate with the father of the young woman to determine the price that he must pay to purchase his bride.
Once the bridegroom paid the purchase price, the marriage covenant was thereby established, and the young man and woman were regarded to be husband and wife.
From that moment on the bride was declared to be consecrated or sanctified, set apart exclusively for her bridegroom.
As a symbol of the covenant relationship that had been established, the groom and bride would drink from a cup of wine over which a betrothal benediction had been pronounced.
After the marriage covenant had been established, the groom would leave the home of the bride and return to his father's house. There he would remain separate from his bride for a period of twelve months.
This period of separation afforded the bride time to gather her trousseau and to prepare for married life.
The groom occupied himself with the preparation of living accommodations in his father's house to which he could bring his bride.
At the end of the period of separation the groom would come to take his bride to live with him.
But what would happen if the Betrothed Bride was found to be with child during this period? As Mary would become … We find the answer in Deuteronomy 22:20 - If a man marries a girl who is claimed to be a virgin, and then finds that she is not, “they shall bring the girl to the entrance of her father’s house and there her townsmen shall stone her to death”
Mary, unwed and pregnant, knew the punishment she faced - stoning. She had nothing but the story of an angel to tell her parents and Joseph, the man she had promised to marry. Joseph would have been well within his rights, even within his duty—to expose her sin and witness her execution.
It was only with the intervention of an angel and Joseph’s own faith-filled acceptance of the angel’s message, that saved both Mary’s life and the life of her unborn baby, the Incarnation of God.
Mary knew exactly what she would face in her home and community after she said her faith-filled “Let it be done to me according to your word” to the visiting angel. And still, she said yes. She trusted that God would take care of her, and he did, through her husband Joseph.
As we spend time in prayer with our Blessed Mother this afternoon, let us remember her undaunted faith and trust in God, to the point that she could say yes to him though it might cause her a shame filled slow and painful death.
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